I Wanted to Save the World, but I Couldn't Find a Babysitter

"I wanted to save the world, but I couldn't find a babysitter."

I saw this quote as I walked out of the doctor's office yesterday -- now let's make that last week! I cannot believe it has been a week. I think I can safely change that quote to, "I tried to do something for myself, like post a blog, but I couldn't find a babysitter."

Trying to find time is so difficult. There are so many different things calling my attention. My children. Their education. Cooking. Cleaning. My husband. Phone calls from moms needing breastfeeding help. Call about new births. Teaching. Cooking. And cleaning it up. Laundry. Chauffeuring to activities. E-mails. The barking dog. Cooking. And cleaning it up, again!

This is my kitchen and it's not even 10 a.m. yet!

All day long I have thoughts in my head that I want to explore and write about. I've started four or five blogs in my head already. Getting here is...hard. So, heck, this is my small post. Hoping to add a photo if I can figure out how to download the damn photos from the camera into the computer and then maybe figure out how to upload it. Probably I can get my thirteen-year-old to help me. That's so lowering, isn't it? I gotta laugh.

So, maybe I am not going to save the world with my blog yet (I did mention that I am idealistic, right?), but I have to remember that each day I care for my family and meet their needs, and each time I support a mother or family I am changing the world for the better even though it may not being anything that anyone can really see; nor do these actions count in any kind of quantitative or qualitative way in American society. But it really is the little things - a smile, a touch, a kind word,  an encouragement -  that really count and can change lives and make the world a better place. What's the little thing (that's really not so little!) that you have done today?

Baby Steps

Photo courtesy of Lulu at Flickr

I love babies. Their little hands and feet. Their chubby folds. Their sweet smell and soft skin. Their deep, penetrating gaze. Their intricate dependancy. And as they grow, their exuberance over each new accomplishment. I look back on my daughters' infancies and I feel so damn lucky that I was there for it all. I feel grateful. I feel a sense of accomplishment. Most of all, I feel a deep sense of satisfaction and pride.

Mothering changed me. Giving birth naturally, breastfeeding my daughters and meeting my daughters' needs empowered me as a woman in ways I could never have thought possible before these experiences. This empowerment unfolded from the way I birthed (and before you get up in arms - believe me, my births weren't perfect - will post about them another time!), from breastfeeding (yes, read extended breastfeeding here) and from wholly giving myself to my daughters' needs.

I know women feel worried that they will lose themselves in motherhood. Fear that it will take over their lives. Well, it does take over your life, that's for sure. But, the amazing thing I discovered is that I really found myself during this process. That by completely and willingly giving of myself, I received this beautiful gift of self-confidence, pride and empowerment. This would have been possible no other way.

Mothering has changed me. I think about life in a different way. This blog is my exploration of delving deeper in the issues surrounding mothering, being a woman and family life.  I am amazed that such a profound role and relationship is given so very little credit or support and, yet, a lot of lip service in our society. Frankly, this fact astounds me, for mothering affects everyone. We are all born from mothers. Designed to be nourished from and connected to our mothers. Designed to be loved and cherished. I think the world would be a much better place if women were truly honored for being the life-bearers that they are. Mothers are sacred.

So begins this journey for me. A journey of investigation, discovery, sharing and creative expression. This is new for me. The computer world is not my world. But it seems like an interesting place to explore and share in. First steps. First key strokes. First words. I did it! My first determined steps into a new world. Mommy's growing up.